The satisfaction found in adapting and creating
A few birthdays ago, somebody told me “Everything changes after 70.” I know we live in an ever-changing society, and I have endured, and often enjoyed, plenty of changes. But my advancing age has required me to be ever more acceptant and adaptable than might be obvious.
When I retired, I enjoyed opportunities to travel with my comfortable companion who loves warm winters spent “down South.” I’ve learned about the desert, an environment that looks austere but teems with life and colour, so different from the green of British Columbia’s forests and the blue of nearby seas.
I invested time and effort into learning to golf. I found it challenging and sometimes fun, especially with a group of beyond-midlife ladies, some playing steadily through their 70s and 80s—and that’s their age, not their score! Now, I golf, but not when the weather is chilly or wet, and only where the score is counted by how many balls were lost!
Embracing change
I thought about my physical comfort and safety for the years ahead, and learned from my eldest sister’s example by clearing out the house with stairs and a big yard where my kids had grown up. I’d lived there for over 20 years. With the help of a star realtor, I sold it and moved into a condo apartment with an elevator and no lawn to mow. My new place looks out onto rustling forest greenery, pierced by the occasional squeals and screams of the eagles who perch on the high, bare stem of their “hunting tree.”
I’m in a book club, a group of seven retirees, where I’ve shared my penchant for Canadian authors (like Helen Humphreys), and been introduced to authors from Korea, Japan, Tibet, and even one from Cortes Island. One summer, we set the goal of only reading books by Indigenous authors.
Giving back to the community
As a long-time member of Grandmothers to Grandmothers (G2G), I contribute to the Stephen Lewis Foundation’s work with community-led groups in sub-Saharan Africa. My colleagues in our G2G group have many talents and skills: sewing, crocheting, crafting, and organizing. One member showed us how to use a drill press to make driftwood Christmas trees. I’m not crafty, but I bake good Scottish shortbread to sell at Christmas. There is great satisfaction in making things and creating events that people in our community are willing to pay for. That money helps us help people far away who have fought the scourge of AIDS, and who continue to work against the spread of HIV and gender-based violence that affects young people’s lives. It makes our work more purposeful.
What I hope to communicate here is that life goes on after 70—if we are lucky and willing. I’m not ready to “go gentle into that good night.” We may lose some physical and mental strengths, and we may be at risk of losing a sense of purpose. We may lose skills, and the new ones we need may not come easily. We lose friends and are challenged to keep reaching out to make new ones.
I’ve learnt a kind of mantra: acknowledge limitations, accept their reality, and adapt with constructive changes and a positive attitude. So if I smile blankly at you when running into you downtown, please give me a moment—I’m trying to remember your name!
